We've all read things that make us bust a gut laughing, but have you ever written anything that made you think you were a god of comedy? Post 'em here!
I'll start by picking a page at random from the WIP, Online Grisly Grizzly Online: Insert Subtitle Here (Book One of the Epic Online Grisly Grizzly Online LitRPG Epic Saga): Context: the MC, Tom, can actually hear the narrator's voice in his head. Nobody else can hear it, so he looks rather silly, if not completely batshit insane, to bystanders when he gets in arguments with the narrator. This is also sloppy copy, so pay no attention to the lack of editing behind the curtain.
This made me happy, especially after a few changes. _________________________ “I never knew Kruul was the reason behind it all, guero,” Pentagra said. “How come you never told me, huh?” “You were just a kid,” Artifex said. “You're still just a kid. I'm not sure it would've made much sense to you.” “Jodete, viejo.” “Whatever,” he said. “Chopar mi fallo.” Pentagra exploded into laughter. “What? What did I just say?” “You told her to chop your failure,” Enudari said. "I assume that is an idiom or euphemism I have yet to discover."
It's not up to me to determine what is or isn't funny. Here's an exchange from Vulgar Display of Power. It's very bare at the moment. _______________________ "So you want me to kill you?" "Yes." "Why?" "To stop Mi." "But you gave me food." "That doesn't matter, monkey. Chen's power flows through Mi. Yu must be stopped." "Wait, wait, wait. Why me?" "Because Chen corrupted Yu and Mi." "Are you insane? Chen never corrupted me." "Of course he did, monkey. You saw what Mi did." "But the sailor said you killed Bolin." "No, Chen killed Bolin. This after Bolin attacked Mi." "Why did he fight you?" "Yu made him fail his deal." "What deal?" "Money laundering for the Triads. Bolin ordered a hit on Mi, which is when you rushed in to stop his goons." "I did." "But Yu stole his money, giving Chen his chance to flee." "Like a coward, yes. But what does that have to do with me?" "Chen wants you." "Me?" "No, you. You and the discarded demon I had." "I didn't know you had a demon!" "The demon now belongs the Chen and empowers Mi. Yu and Mi? Spiritually linked. Without Mi, Yu will die." "So why do you want me to kill you?" "Monkey, you're starting to piss me off, I'm getting angry." "I am asking you a question. I don't need to kill you. And if what you say is true, you won't kill me anyway." "You have to kill Mi to kill Chen." "But I don't want to kill you." "It doesn't matter. You still have to kill Mi." "Can't I just kill Yu?" "Yes! Yes! Exactly. Yu must die in order to kill Mi and Chen." "Me too?" "Obviously." "Not just you?" "No." "Why me?" "To kill Yu!" "Why you?" "To kill Mi!" "Why me?!" "To kill Chen!" "Why not just kill Chen?" "Because you have to kill Mi to break his and the demon's power!" "Wait, but why kill me?" "To kill Yu!" "Then why kill you?" "To kill Mi!" "So I kill you?" "Yu and Mi." "But why me?" "To kill Yu!" "Why you?!" "To kill Mi!" "But... Me... and you..." "Rely on each other's chi, yes. Kill Mi and Yu will die and Chen will be open." "How can I possibly kill Chen?!" "Because he won't have any power after you kill Mi." "Wait, wait, wait. So you're saying that if I kill you..." "That'll make Mi wither and die so you can attack Chen." "So wait, who do I kill first? You or me?" "Mi!" Sun shrugged and said, "Fine." Then Sun killed her. As she went down, she gasped, "Why did you kill me?!" "You told me to kill you!" "I said to kill YU!" "No, you said to kill you." "Yes, you damn monkey! Not me!" "But you said...." ________________________
