Anyone up for a game of ridiculous answers?

I dont know if this is the right place for it, or if anyone is even interested in playing, so move or delete if necessary.

I challenge you all to a game of ridiculous answers!

How does it work you ask?

I'll start off by asking a question.
You just have to answer it. The more off the wall your answer is the better. Bonus points for completely wrong yet plausible answers.
Once you've answered the latest question, ask a question of your own to keep the game going.

Ready? Well, lets get started!

Why do aliens only abduct crazy people?

 

Well, isn't it obvious? They are harvesting our world. Our world is the galaxies most abundant source of Ignoranium, which powers their star drives. They first started in the 60's, just collecting the Ignoranium that was floating around, but then quickly learned they could cultivate it. Their first experiment at cultivating Ignoranium was the release of the song Blue by Eiffel 65. It was moderately successful. They hit the jackpot a decade later, when they started producing reality TV. First they used Jersey Shore, which produced abundant amounts of Ignoranium. Then they expanded by creating Toddlers and Tiaras, and Duck Dynasty.
The galaxy now has a surplus of Ignoranium.

Where did all the dragons go?

 

Actually, as my old buddy Rincewind would tell me, "John, are you going to pay me back that loan?" Now, that really doesn't have anything to do with the dress and also is a question and not a statement, however, he also told me that octarine is the color of magic. Octarine can only be seen by wizards and cats. I sometimes suspect that dolphins can see it, but, we all know what wankers they can be, so, we can ignore them.

The dress was made from a discworld silk, which, in being moved onto the internet acquired more magic than normal, which turned it octarine. This would cause the varying descriptions of its color, due to the inability of mundanes to perceive octarine. Think of this as an effect similar to the emperor's new clothes. No one wants to admit they can't tell the color, so, they make one up.

What is the reason why tornados love trailer parks?

 

What is the reason why tornados love trailer parks?[/QUOTE]

Trailer parks are often the butt of jokes in American culture, and not the least among them is the idea that they seemingly "attract" tornadoes. A study by scientists at Indiana's Purdue University recently found that tornadoes really are more likely to hit trailer parks simply due to where they're located.Trailer parks are commonly located in these "transition zones," on the outskirts of cities where you start seeing more open fields than houses.

As the researchers found, the thought that trailer parks are tornado magnets is partially true, but the real reason for this perception lies behind these homes' poor construction.

While most trailer parks are located in areas that traditionally see more tornadoes (and, subsequently, a higher risk to get hit by one), the idea that trailer parks are tornado magnets stems from the fact that mobile homes are extremely susceptible to damage in a severe thunderstorm.
Trailers/mobile homes are not built very well. The materials used are usually pretty cheap, and the entire home is prefabricated and anchored to a lot once someone buys it. Trailer parks suffer heavy damage in even weak tornadoes because the homes are just not able to withstand the wind and flying debris. It's for this reason why the National Weather Service explicitly tells people to flee mobile homes when they issue a tornado warning.

The next time tornadoes touch down in your area, listen to the local news and see how often you hear reports of damage to a trailer park compared to other homes nearby. Odds are, the single-family homes will have significantly less damage than the mobile homes.


A true mystery of the ages.... which came first, the chicken or egg?

 

Ah that one is simple. It's also the reason I knock on every door before I open it.

You see, this one time, I was out drinking with my pal Foghorn Leghorn. And well, roosters can't hold their liquor. I offered to call his missus, but he insisted that she was out of town visiting her sister.
So I took the drunken rooster home, and dragged him into his house. Being a good friend, I didn't just leave him face down in the entryway. I carried him to his room. Upon opening the door to his bedroom, I was confronted by a sight that I shall never forget. Now matter how hard I try. There was ol' Humpty Dumpty, on top of Missus Leghorn.
You want to talk disturbing? You haven't seen disturbing, until you see a 6' tall eggman's O face!



Why do hotdogs come in packs of 10, while hotdog buns come in packs of 8?

 

Why do hotdogs come in packs of 10, while hotdog buns come in packs of 8?

The reason has to do with numerology and esoteric metaphysics. In Bavarian Press's text, Packaging and the Sacred Magic of Abramelin, it states, "Only through the combination of Feng Shui and the underlying principals of Sacred Geometry can true packaging occur".

Hot dog buns, by their combination of all the elements, earth from wheat, water from mixing, fire from cooking and air from spongy nooks, are considered to be all elements. This combination raises it from the realm of its parts, and into a higher realm of being. In order for the packaging to be perfected in sacred geometry, they must be placed in groups of eight. Eight is a symbolization of stepping into a higher realm, with, eight on its side representing infinity,

Hot Dogs themselves are a symbol of closure. The life of the animal has ended, the cycle of life has reached its peak, and so the packaging is ten. We see here the closure inherent in the number ten, however, ten is writ as one and zero, 10. When combined in a numerological manner, it converts into 1. One is the number of beginnings. So, we see in the packaging of hot dogs, both the numbering of ending and beginning.

Hot dog buns represent the combination of all the elements into a higher form, which is represented by packaging in eights.

Hot dogs themselves are a symbol of the circle of life, represented by being packaged in 10.

The two packages represent the metaphysical concept that, when combined, form the concept of evolutionary reincarnation, where the two cycles will require many turnings of the wheel of karma until they match in a transcendent one true hot dog, the ending of both and their completion into Hot Dog Buddhahood.

I will admit, some of this is also from the writings of the sage Oscar Meyer in his Liber Hot Dog, the psychonomicon of lunch with mustard.

Are coconuts migratory?

 

Are coconuts migratory?[/QUOTE]

In a word, yes.

Everyone knows that they were dispersed by giant sharknado's in the early Mesozoic era arounda.. 256 Ma. Prehistoric coconuts were parasitic. In their larval form, which we are used to seeing in supermarkets today, they would fall from trees and roll into the ocean. Once in the sea they would float around in search of a host shark to infest, prehistoric sharks being preferred. Once inside the sharks they would enter their pups phase of life and remain to live out the rest of their days. Once the pups coconuts developed into adults, the sharks brain would be pushed out it's nose and the adult coconut would take over all brain functions.

Once every 1000 years the adult coconuts with hosts would perform a migratory ritual. Swimming in circles to form Super Sharknado's, they would travel across the globe seeking breeding grounds. Once a suitable location was found the Sharknado was brought to terminal velocity and the coconut sharks would eject themselves towards the ground. With the combination of mass and velocity, they would impact burying themselves. The decaying shark would then serve as a source of nutrients for the future growth of more coconuts. Sadly with the introduction and evolution of mankind, the coconuts have ceased all migration in a protest to the ignorance of mother nature to ever concoct a race of beings stupid enough to believe anything I just wrote, and consequently, your dumb ass just read.


If our knees bent the other direction, what would chairs look like?

 

Often confused with a crying smiley or a shovel, I can tell you with my axe in one hand, my shovel in the other and my masters in archeology and ancient text deciphering that this is millennia old hieroglyph that tells less of an interesting story as it is still common among today's population but gives more insight to mans ego and mating rituals if you know what I am getting at. It appears that amongst other things that are misinterpreted, someone thought it would be funny to insert an inside joke in a new "language", that which we call internet short hand. But it isn't to say that there isn't more than one meaning. While those amateurs were eager to scream c*** & balls in your face, it actually pulls from an older theory that states, shield your balls before your sword, for a broken sword can still be used where broken balls are rendered useless.

Is it possible for the human brain to decipher braille backwards if the reader doesn't know it before hand? Or to still understand something in braille that is mispelled?

 

8===D is this a shovel or crying smiley face? So confused?[/QUOTE]


Your self portrait? Jajajaja

 

It's a rocket ship. Annnnnnnnnnnnnd post.

 

What lies at the bottom of black holes?[/QUOTE]

That isn't a question you need to be asking. Consider yourself warned.


Blonde, Brunette, or Redhead... which are more fun?

 

Brunette has always been my taste. Ive found blondes to be vindictive and redheads to be batshit crazy. But this isn't a question that I should be answering. Could have used a warning before hand. Its proven that the souls of each contribute to various stat increases tho so depending on what you are building and what you can tolerate, any may be worth it. As a Rogue, I needed a boost instealth and brunettes give a +8 to blend.

Sharp cheddar &beer or bacon for the rest of your life? only 1, the other will kill you instantly.

 

That was actually Jeremy Bigfellow, a proctologist in London England. He was the official, By Her Majesty's Order, Appointed Proctologist to Parliment. The main duties that he performed were to ensure that Parliment never was too full of shit. This duty he performed for years, until his forced retirement during the London Blitz of WW2. During a massive planning session of the war effort, Bigfellow was called in in an emergency. Admiral Lipsnitz, Prime Polisher of the Handle of the Big Front Door had developed a dangerous level of being full of shit. That night, it was a terrible bombing attack by the Germans, forcing a major blackout. Bigfellow bravely pushed his way through the chaos, however, when he arrived, an error was made. Instead of administering the needed procedure to the Admiral, it was accidentally administered to General Armband Thruster, who at the time was planning part of the invasion of Europe at Calais, to be led by General Patton. Unfortunately, General Thruster had a massive explosion of shit, which completely destroyed the plans, necessitating activation of the fallback attack at Normandy. When asked what happened Dr. Bigfellow replied,"No battle plan survives contact with the enema". General Patton remarked,' There is no way the bastards of the press would repeat that shit, change it to enemy!"

Since we're in WW2, What is considered the most crucial event of the war?

 

When President Jason revealed he was a Nazi sympathizer and detonated half our nuclear arsenal where they sat. The U.S. may never be as strong as we once were but VP W. Azazel gave us a great shot and is only by his leadership that we are still in the war, much less still alive. I named my son after him.

Do you think there will ever be a bigger traitor than that Jason fellow? Can you believe the pictures that got out of his face after Azazel shot him with the Face/Ass rearranger lazer hand cannon. He was ass ugly. Suffocation by lung outlet misplacement has to suck!